Day 8 into the family self quarantine. We started doing some of the suggested distance learning assignments that some of the kids teachers passed to the parents, until things get sorted. I am keeping my expectations low in the moment and being realistic about any work actually getting done. I have four kids home ages 5-10 and they are not so excited about any school work assigned to be completed at home.
I’m trying to keep it interesting, but I am not organized or consisted enough to embrace colored coded schedules of activities to keep their little minds fresh, engaged and sharp.
There is no afternoon yoga or scheduled exercise, no healthy snacks. It’s me and my four kids contained indoors, if weather permits; getting outside to play a bit and lets not fail to mention, the overwhelming anxiety of all the uncertainties about what in the actual f*ck is occurring.
My sons O/T teacher actualy emailed me this morning to let me know that she would like to continue to keep his O/T schedule up during this time through video. I responded that we could try, but I also made mention Of where my views lie at the moment, if it doesn’t work, I’m not bending over backwards to make it work.
The situation of this global pandemic is not anywhere near the normal that they were living just a week ago and as important as it may feel to try and keep things normal…
THINGS. ARE. NOT. NORMAL.
I believe that part of helping kids learn resiliancy in times of extreme change is to not pretend that things that are happening are not. Making up stories to “protect” their fragile views of the world at large, basically to me feels like a lot of mumble jumble about laying the framework of a belief system that warps reality into a system of denial. I feel like there is no reason to lie to my kids about what is happening and feel that a realistic view of what is occuring is the reality they need to navigate through what life may be in the future as a result of this. I see so many people posting abuou keeping things normal, which to some extent seems absolutley ridiculous. Nothing is normal.
Wait, let me repeat that for those in the back that might have missed that….
THINGS. ARE. NOT. NORMAL. I myself am conducting myself in somewhat of a normal is manner as I go through the motions of daily life, but there is a different tint to life right now it’s a color of experience I have never yet experienced at any level.
Things have changed. Things will continue to change. Who is to say thigs will ever go back to the bubble of normalcy it used to be….but then again maybe it shouldn’t?
There is a part of me that feels like maybe it shouldn’t.
My experience at large has shown me that if you want to see how something functions, put a little pressure on it , create some unexpected variables and observe the effects. Can it be sustained or continue to meet the expectations in a normal fashion? Because if not, then it in most cases it is most likely an illusion. A false idea that serves a sense of safety and security, which doesn’t actually exist in the way it should, when it is desperately needed to do so. For myself and I’m sure I am not alone in this, I feel as though, the idea of this “system” that is supposed to lead us cannot handle the pressure that has been placed upon it.
People are nervous, I’m nervous. I’m not a multi million dollar business. I am a very small home based business with one employee, which also happens to be me. I’m very grateful for the business I get, but I’m still building it and it is not at the level of self sufficient support…yet. Basically, the mortgage does not get paid through my efforts. Although the plans I had, were to achieve a degree of financial stability through my efforts with Mighty Delighty.
I’m concerned how other people are going to weather this storm. I am well aware that I am fortunate or let me be really honest; privileged enough in the way that I am able to ponder and write about my thoughts on all this. I know without a shadow of a doubt there are so many others who do not get to do that, the reality is that there are others that stand to lose so much more then just their peace of mind.
But I digress, at this point in time March 20, 2020. Governor Cumo signs an executive order mandating businesses that rely on in-office personnel to decrease their in-office workforce by 75 percent , with considerations being made to essential service business. The confirmed cases in NY are at 5713 according to WorldoMeter.
I beleive California has issued a stay at home order yesterday, which is mind blowing considering the size of the state.
Four US senators were discovered to have sold stock after a virus briefing back in January, confriming how fundementally broken and dishonest some goverment people can be. Essentailly the argument is that they knew what was coming, failed to inform others and chose to play down the signifigance of the virus and convienently used the information provided to them in regards to the severity of this virus that would take hold of out county soon to cash out to some extent.
It is more than obvious to anyone with a brain (Or is it?) the pandemic isn’t a democratic HOAX. But Trump doing what he always does told his followers at one of those ridiculous ralliesM where he just talks and talks about anything any everything that pops in his mind, seems to keep promoting the divide between us all, to keep us all bikering with each other.
I am ashamed of him as our “ leader”, Im ashamed at the huge rift of discontentment he seems to grow larger in. I can’t fathom or understand how he was given such a platform of power, to essentially drive us all further from each other, continuing to create a state of divisivness. Yes, I am aware that people have a choice to listen to what he says or not.
But it doesn’t make sense, he doesn’t make sense, he is so against anything I thought we as a country stood for.
HIS actions and his many inactions speak louder than any words that fall from his mouth. He is a liar.
Currently the fears are that as this pandemic progresses, the hospitals will not be able to cope with the influx of sick people. I “Hear” that testing is becoming more available, although at the same time it is not. Those in the medical field, on the front lines, DO NOT have the proper supplies or equipment to meet this illness in any way that it would eve be considered fair at all. It’s like they are being set up to just fail.
Those with power to actually help and do something NEED to stand up and take action.
I’m a stay at home mom of four kids, I can keep mys kids home and hope to not contribute to the spread. That is just about all I can do. Keeping ourselves quarantined is not intended to stop the disease, it’s a measure to slow down the spread and infection in order to give us time enough to find, create and discover ways to treat or vaccinate against this virus effectively.
Some days I just don’t understand the dynamics at play. We are told that the US is the most powerful country in the world, we are so wonderful etc. , etc. But yet, in this moments of crisis as we are currently experiencing, those that have the power to do something significant almost seem unable to act accordingly. Most people see what needs to be done and some are doing what they can. But mostly those that want to do more are not in the positions to do so.
Today, I don’t feel very optimistic. I feel uncertain, overwhelmed, pressured in ways I never have experienced before and I feel sad. Just sad. Hopefully something will happen in the next few days to provide me and so many others something to grab onto. Because I feel so deep into the core of my being, this is just the beginning of something that has the capacity to change everything in a way that wil first be messy, dark, and slightly more crazy before any type sanity cam again to become a part of life. Or I’m being very dramatic, which also is very plausible.
Be well ,stay healthy, wash your hands and look forward towards this uncertain future with positive thoughts of a better future for us all.
